Today February 26, 2014 is known as Pink Shirt Day to raise awareness and bring an end to bullying. This is the 7th annual Pink Shirt Day and it was all started by two Nova Scotia Teens.
David Shepherd, Travis Price and their teenage friends organized a high-school protest to wear pink in sympathy with a Grade 9 boy who was being bullied for wearing a pink shirt. They took a stand against bullying when they protested against the harassment of a new Grade 9 student by distributing pink T-shirts to all the boys in their school.
‘I learned that two people can come up with an idea, run with it, and it can do wonders,’ says Mr. Price, 17, who organized the pink protest. ‘Finally, someone stood up for a weaker kid.’
So Mr. Shepherd and some other headed off to a discount store and bought 50 pink tank tops. They sent out message to schoolmates that night, and the next morning they hauled the shirts to school in a plastic bag.
As they stood in the foyer handing out the shirts, the bullied boy walked in. His face spoke volumes. ‘It looked like a huge weight was lifted off his shoulders,’ Mr. Price recalled.
The bullies were never heard from again.
This is something that is very near and dear to my heart as growing up I was viciously bullied throughout grade school and high school.
In grade school I was bullied for having two different coloured eyes, the kids would call me husky and bark at me. This caused lasting effects for years as I would cut my hair (and still do to this day) with side bangs to cover my one eye in hopes people won’t notice. As much as I love my eyes now as an adult when I think of the way I was treated for being different it still hurts and still causes me to be self-conscious about my eyes.
I also remember in grade school having a green snowsuit one year. I loved the snowsuit so much and begged my mom to buy it for me. I proudly went to school in my new snow suit only to find myself faced with bullies again. The kids would chant “Ho Ho Ho Green Giant” all recess long. The snowsuit I once loved I now hated from that moment on but because my mother was a single mom raising 3 children I couldn’t get a new snowsuit.
(if you are wondering which awkward looking kid I am, I am the top left lol)
Middle school didn’t get any better, the verbal bullying turned into physical bullying and I had my head smashed up against the brick wall of the school, I was spit on, called names and felt alienated. I did have a small group of friends but no matter how many friends you have when you are being bullied you feel completely alone and helpless.
I was hopeful high school would be different and I started off grade 9 with lots of friends. However it didn’t take long for the bullying to begin again. It was about half way through grade nine, I was 14 years old when I was at a neighbors home hanging out watching music videos, my brother and sister were home next door and my mother was at work. There was a knock on my neighbors door, I heard someone coming up the stairs towards my neighbors bedroom where we had been watching tv. I got up thinking it was my neighbor and started heading towards the door to ask her who it was when a female whom I had never met turned the corner and instantly began punching me in the face. Unknown to me at the time my neighbor had no idea what this girl was coming to do and was downstairs in fear listening to what was going on as we were home alone, her mother was also at work. She backed me into the closet doorway and continued to punch me, I ended up falling into the closet and to protect myself curled up into a fetal position with my arms up covering as much of my body and face as they could. It was then that I saw blood running down my arm and realized the punches were not punches, she was stabbing me. When she finished she took off down the stairs, I had no idea where she had gone but I ran down the stairs, out the front door and across the driveway to my house leaving a trail of blood behind me. I called for my brother and sister to bring me some towels and I picked up the phone and dialed 911. Somehow through all of this I was calm and the operator at 911 scolded me for “pretending to have an emergency” I loudly yelled into the phone at her “I am bleeding and need a (pardon my french) f***ing ambulance”. It was then she took me serious, apologized and said help was on the way. My brother who was 17 at the time called my mother at work and told her what happened, she rushed to the hospital to meet me there. I had been stabbed , once in the left forearm, twice in my upper left shoulder, once in the left side of my rib cage area and twice in my left buttock. The doctor told me it was very smart of me to have curled up the way I did protecting my vital organs because this situation could have been a lot worse. I was stitched up and sent home. This girl who stabbed me was a minor, I believe she was only 17 at the time and due to her age she was given one year in juvenile and one year in a halfway house. As much as I have accepted and forgiven what this person did to me this incident has altered my life forever. I become very anxious in large crowded settings, I am weary of strangers and am always looking over my shoulder even still to this day. For years I would wake up in a panic checking to make sure all my windows and doors were locked.
Of course after that I changed schools but a new school just meant a new set of bullies for me to deal with. Throughout grade 11 and 12 I was constantly threatened by girls in class who sat behind me. They would threaten to beat me up with baseball bats, they would make fun of me, call me names and so on. It all took a toll on me and I began skipping school, drinking heavily and experimenting with drugs, I became a very angry person inside. I had constant run in’s with both the principle and vice principl and ended up getting expelled from school two credits shy of my diploma. I moved out of my mothers home at a young age and continued on my destructive path to no where.
At 19 I became pregnant with my first child Chris and he saved my life. My choice to keep him changed the course of my life and headed me down a more positive path. If it wasn’t for him I most likely would have continued down the destructive path I was on and could very well not be here today. In the years since the birth of my first child, I have gone to college but dropped out as I felt I could teach myself the skills they were teaching me for free with online programs which I did, I worked for both the federal and provincial government in various offices as an administrative assistant (without a high school or college diploma) by proving to them I had the skills or could learn them quickly, worked as an ECEA at a private daycare again with no formal education just personal life experience, became a single mother raising at that time two young children while working full time, met my wonderful partner and began working for myself as a blogger and in almost 4 years since starting the ECM blog have achieved great success helping Canadians save money. I have also over the past 4 years been in a position to give back through my skills of saving money I have helped countless organizations and individuals by donating $1000.00’s of dollars in products and food to help those in need.
Although life handed me at times tough situations and at times I didn’t think I would make it through and almost gave up there was a voice, a drive inside me to overcome what has happened to me in my life and not use it as an excuse to lay down and give up.
Bullying doesn’t just happen to kids and teens though, through my online work as a blogger I have not only been at the receiving end of online bullying but have witnessed it happening to others. I have watched grown adults attack others in open forums and on social media, attack companies on social media and more.
Bullying is bullying and it is not okay no matter what age, race, or gender. As adults we need to set examples for our children, we need to raise a new generation one without hate in their hearts, one with acceptance and love for all. There have been far too many children lost to suicide who thought that was their only way out, and far too many people hiding who they truly are for fear of not being accepted. We as adults and parents have a responsibility to teach our children right from wrong and you may not think your children notice or pick up on your actions towards others but they do. Children at a very young age are like little sponges and if they see you mistreating someone they will think that is okay when it is not.
Let’s all make a promise today to continue to be positive role models for our children and the youth of today, be kind to each other and accept that everyone is different and that is ok!
Feel free to share your story below in the comments if you ever experienced bullying or if your children experienced bullying and what you did to cope or help your children get through it!
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Denise Lushman says
Wow, your story touched my heart in many ways. I have gone through bullying myself as well as my daughter has. You are very strong for not giving up. Some day I will share my story…..Good on you for sharing yours and getting through it!
Jena says
Remarkable story. You have overcome a lot. The pictures you shared just shows how beautiful you were and I’m sure the bullying was due to jealousy. So sorry you had to go through that. Nobody should. Thank you for all you do! You help so many families!
Rhonda Pieters says
your story made me weep … I too was bullied, but was a tough little nut and often was able to just live day to day till I graduated. To my horror my youngest – my son went through the bowels of hell to survive elementary school and often I handled it the way the so called professionals said too > wrong wrong wrong!!! Stand your ground, FIGHT BACK!! GET HELP!! Never ever will I forgive myself for the 8 years a living nightmare I allowed my son to live through. I wrote this a couple months ago in my online diary (bubblews) — it’s the only thing I saved before deleting my account.
Dear Parents of the boy who followed my son home……
When will you listen? What does it take for you to understand that your little angel is a Devil in disguise? You really need to stop pointing your finger at my unruly son who cries too much, spends a lot of time in the green room because of his emotional outburst.
I’m so tired of grounding my little boy for weeks on end; I’m tired of taking away his computer, his Wii, his PS. Because he takes your kid crap for only so long..and then blows. I punish him because I want him to learn that losing control when your son stabs him with a pencil in his back is not acceptable, I yell at him because he cries uncontrollably when he tattle tails about your son stomping on his ankle and fracturing it in 2 places playing soccer.
My son is sleeping in an empty bedroom, only a mattress and box spring, with one pillow and 2 blankets. No lights, no toys, no books, no desk, no clothes, no pictures – why?? He has to be punished for pushing your son off him as his hand was being held in the bowling ball return on their class trip. So sad, your son can injure my poor little troubled boy – when will someone notice my son’s injuries? Broken ankles, broken collar arms, broken fingers, dislocated shoulder, broken cheek bones, broken nose, so many bruises. We won’t even talk about times my poor boy walked home in the rain and snow with no boots, no shoes, no coat > the boogie man takes them and they never return.
I just watched the good little angel.. my oldest daughter holds me down – not letting me out of the car — I watch the little angel follow my son out the doors as the bell has rung – like a Stalker on my sons heels, there is a dark angel pulling his backpack, kicking out trying to trip the real innocent one, I hear the foul words pouring out of the so called angel. I cannot help my boy – he must hold it in, it’s what we teach him > ignore, walk away, don’t listen.
I’m sorry my sweet boy – your mommy didn’t help you, mommy sat and watched. Mommy failed, you had to learn to control it, and you had to suck it up. The principle, police, teachers, the GOOD parents of the Angels > they never said sorry, even when it was too late. I don’t have a little boy anymore. I have a shell of boy who is tired of not being heard. All I can say is I’m sorry, I’m glad you’re in a happy place now. Love you sweet boy, you’re not in trouble anymore.
Every day, I say “have a good day” to my troubled boy > pray that he has gotten past the nightmare – the nightmare of being bullied, I pray my boy will come home. My troubled boy attempted to take his own life twice before help was provided by our family doctor who made the connection that all his ER visits occurred during school hours. But, it was already too late..the suicide attempts followed the airing of the schools dirty secret..I hold onto hope, as now 3 years have passed since my troubled boy started grade 9 at a public high school and with medical help and has come to terms with the negligence of his grade school and me his mommy. His biggest help was a coach — a giant of a man — a bully of a man — he pushed and he yelled but he has my boy proud of himself, and pushes him to be active with peers and enlisted him to Defense – my boy is now big, he is controlled, he has learned control from the best Coach.
And to you parents who point fingers at everybody and say “No, my angel is not a Bully , he/she would never do that” > WAKE UP, get over yourselves and face the truth….before another child becomes so lost, so unwanted, so misunderstood that the only choice in their mind is to walk to heaven’s door…….
DeBalino says
I’m in tears reading this. What you went through in all phases of your life. Sorry, just doesn’t cut it. We are very supportive of the pinkshirt anti-bullying movement and I hope it just gets stronger! You have been a saving grace for many, and as painful as life has been for you – so much has come out of the tragedies. Look at you now! And what a blessing your sweet girl is in your life. She changed everything just at the right time. I know your story will inspire many. It certainly inspired me! #Bullyingendshere